A Necessary Change

I had a terrible experience this week.
It had to do with my children, and it happened at a park we've been to a hundred times.
It got me thinking.
Since the beginning of this blog, I've considered many times whether or not I'm comfortable displaying my family on the internet. I like keeping this record of our daily lives, and sharing it with those of you who care to check in. I have appreciated the outlet that it has become, as I have missed the writing I once did when my hands weren't so full of babies.
However, the world is unpredictable and evil lurks, and so I have stepped onto the path that so many wise mommy-bloggers before me have taken. I have renamed my family.
And so it is, an odd thing to get used to, but the right thing to do.
May God bless us and keep us, and give us peace.

What's become of me?

I have a problem. I don't think I'm normal.
It's September. From what I understand, this means new shows on tv, and new seasons of old shows.
I don't care.*
Desperate Housewives offends me. House makes me roll my eyes. I tried to watch an episode of Grey's Anatomy once; I almost threw up. American Idol? Been there, done that, about 6 times too many.
So what am I excited about?
Football.
When I see the promos for the start of the NFL season, I get a tingly feeling in my stomach.
I'm even kind of holding a grudge against someone who suggested the other day that the Lions aren't worth watching anymore.
There's not much I enjoy more than coming home from Mass on Sunday and curling up on the couch with my hubby to watch the games. This year, it will be with the chicken wings we discovered.
How did this happen to me? Was I destined to develop this boy-like quality? Or is this a result of the gender imbalance in my household?
Speaking of Mr. Smith, he says this makes me the coolest wife ever.
I guess maybe it's not such a problem after all.


*I'm certainly not claiming to be one of those good people who don't watch any tv. I do. I even enjoy The Biggest Loser and will be watching that this season, starting tonight. Just please do not ask me what I think about whatever happened on the 307th season of Big Brother last night. I feel yucky just typing the name of that one.

Safety First

I caught Isaac walking around with a pencil in his hand, which everyone in the house knows is not allowed.
Not to worry though. The big boys pointed out that he also had Owen's safety glasses on.
That he did.
Well then, carry on.

Life

Last night, or rather this morning, somewhere near 1:00am, I was awakened by my nursling needing his mama. A normal nightly occurance, except this time with more urgency, as the congestion from his cold had settled in somewhere between his nose and his chest, making breathing and nursing difficult.


As I was pulled out of my peaceful slumber, I felt a pang of pity for myself, knowing this was likely the beginning of a long night.


Then I thought of Colleen. A woman I do not know, but for whom my heart breaks.


I discovered her blog ages ago, when we were both moms to a mere four boys, or so, a piece. Then it was five, and then, for her, six. A "band of brothers", so like the one dear to me.


I scooped up my baby and brought him out to the living room. I wiped his nose, cuddled him, and marveled at the wonder of a baby, so dependent on his mama. Caring for him, at all hours, is a small sacrifice for the reward of being his earthly mother.


As I nursed him, I thought of her again. How she must be producing milk, for a baby she can no longer put to her breast; her body needing to catch up with the stark reality of her loss.


And those brothers... Oh how I ache when I think of those brothers.


But are they not better off for having had him, even for such a short time, and at such a cost of grief?


I cradled my own for hours, without a care for the clock, even as 4:00am approached, intermittantly praying for her, and thanking for me.

A sleepless night, but a blessing, another night together.